I don’t really talk about my college sex stories and sexcapades, because it feels like another lifetime ago. However, I feel like there might be a lot of people that are in college right now who might be reading this story and who might get a kick from some of my experiences. College is a weird time. Whether you go to University of Texas of some other podunk college, it’s all the same. Everyone thinks they are way cooler than they really are in college. It’s not ever cool to get kicked out of a college party, just because you stole some jock’s malt liquor. This is this same for every other asinine thing you’ve done in college. Everyone also thinks that they know exactly what they want to do with their lives after they leave college, which is an absolutely fallacy. No one knows what they want to do with the rest of their lives after college, but what they do know is that they want to get laid, all the goddamn time, with attractive girls. Here are some of the girls I’ve slept with when I was in college.
This girl was insane. I remember there being a few of these types of girls that I would regularly sleep with when I was in college, because they were quite easy to get in bed. While they weren’t traditionally pretty they had great bodies, tits and they could fuck in bed like no other girl could. They were easy, because no other guys wanted them. They worked in the tech and science labs. They talked about nerdy things and used big words. They were the type of girl you’d be embarrassed to take to a party. Also, when you gave them a good 7 roper on their eye glasses, not only was it hot, but they enjoyed it and wanted more.
The Blonde Cum-Dumpster
Maybe calling her a cum-dumpster is a little harsh, but some of these girls I was surprised were even accepted to a college. Most of the time their hair was blonde, but sometimes you could see the old shade of shit brown coming through. These girls were not to great in bed, but they were drop dead gorgeous. Most of these types of girls don’t need to be great in bed. They can get by just on their beauty alone. Usually they were found en masse at a number of different college bars around the campus. Her college apartment was full of cheap furniture that her dad bought her and her music taste was terrible. When we did have conversations they were long and boring and every time she interjected it was like she had blacked out the entire time and didn’t know where she was. But you weirdly had a lot of sex with her, despite her many shortcomings, only because she was beautiful.
The Art Star
This girl was a freak in the bedroom too. Always having been misunderstood she was angry and resentful of men and was a hair away from becoming a lesbian. She had already had a DUI or two under her belt, a chronically over the limit blood alcohol level, and loved to have drunk sex. For the record: I only had sex with her while she was sober, I made sure of it. In addition, she never wanted to use a condom while we were doing it, but I made sure we did, because I wasn’t about to have a bunch of babies with a defected girl who desperately needed to grow up and gain the acceptance of her father. Also, her apartment was always covered in her shitty art and she often cried tears of I don’t know what after sex.
This girl was sweet and she was in the drama department. While she wasn’t a great actress, she was fun to be around, because she had a genuinely great sense of humor. Jim Belushi was her idol and she had posters of him and Gilda Radner on the walls of her college apartment. She was also a guy’s girl and liked drinking beer in cans and when you needed someone to run to the liquor store to buy beer she was always on it with a cute snort laugh that made you want to cuddle and fuck her to sleep. She was also always from little town on the Kentucky-Tennessee border and had dreams of making it to the Big Apple or Hollywood. You would have sex with her knowing full well that she would never become successful, but you told her she would just to get in her pants.
The Foreign Girl
I only slept with one foreign chick when I was in college. She was a young, hot Swedish girl with a thick accent and she screamed “Ya” every time she came. It was amazing. I met this girl one day when she came running up to me with a map trying to figure out where one of her classes was. It turned out we were in the same class. Ironically, it was an Ethics and Sexuality class, which if you’ve read this blog you know I didn’t learn one thing in that course. But the Swedish girl and I started talking and after a few weeks we started dating here and there. Apparently, her parents owned a ski chalet, because every one in Sweden skis apparently. Her accent was thick and her English wasn’t that great, but it wasn’t long before we were having great sex together. She was confident in bed, unlike most American girls. Her body was also amazing and she had big tits. Unfortunately, foreign chicks don’t stick around. After they take advantage of an American education they usually go back home for good. The Swiss girl left eventually and our days of her screaming “Ya” during sex were over. In the end, though, I was in Switzerland not more than a couple of years ago and I saw her again. She was all grown up and looked even more beautiful than I remembered. We went to her parent’s chalet and skied and fucked on bear skin rugs and it was incredible, to say the least.